Classes are Wednesday's 6:45 PST
Practices and Techniques (homework) is always given at the end of the live class and it will be indicated on this page.
The link at the top of this page will bring your to the live class and it will also be emailed to you.
Can't make it?
I strongly encourage you to join the group every week as the group energy is powerful. If you can not be there, you will be able to key in questions before hand.
All classes are recorded and downloadable. Do your very best to keep moving forward, listen to the current class that week, it is okay if you listen in small chunks. If you download the recording and never get around to it could put your momentum on hold.
Help, the service kicked me off of the call?
Call back, all seminar services have their glitches.
Practices And Techniques
Assignments are given in detail during the classes. Templates and Support Material will be spelled out here as well.
Soulmate Magnetization Step 9
Make a list of each subject and a plan on how you will carry it out.
1. Things I need to do to get ready for love.
2. Fun things I should be doing now I'm single.
3. How I can create a world where I could be happy and invite my soulmate into. This a little open for interpretation. However, Including these three things on your list:
- Connecting in a deeper way with all the people you encounter.
- Not taking everything that happens in your life to seriously- meaning make more space for spontaneity and fun.
- Make time for freedom; i.e. dont be busy all of the time. Make time to look up into the sky, go hiking even if it is for 20 minutes a week.
Soulmate Magnetization Step 7
Date in A Completely Different Manner
This homework is long, concentrate on the 4 exploration questions. The rest is for your before, during, and after dating experience as detailed in class. A quick Checklist PDF is included in the bonus section.
Exploration: Give some deep thought to what comes up for you as you answer these questions. It will give you a good idea of what you can enhance or dissolve in your life.
1. List all of the places where you might date:
Example: grocery store, company picnics, potluck gathering.
2. List all the ways you can show you are open to love:
Examples: Affection, holding longer eye contact, flirting, asking to hang out.
3. What Dating Experience in your past made you feel free?
Examples: Openly flirting, being outdoors, playing board games, touch.
4. What Dating experience in your past made you feel un-free?
Examples: Mis-leading people, trying to date every weekend, interacting with too many people around.
Before Your Date
1st Pump your self up with positive affirmations about yourself, love and dating. List off all of the amazing things that you are and that you can do.
Affirmations Example: “I am worthy of love.” “ I am so fun to spend time with.” “ I can hold pleasing banter with the best of them.” “Love feels good and I am excited to share that with someone.”
You can also do this during your date when you get a few moments by yourself.
2nd Be Open And Ready
Magic can happen on EVERY DATE; there are endless possibilities andThe Universe has your back. The person you are dating could be your one. They may one day introduce you to your one. They could reveal something about you that you needed to know about yourself so that you can find love. ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN.
3rd Vow To Have A Good Time No Matter What
-You are connecting with another human being, and there is something awesome about them, even if they aren’t someone you may see again.
Do these things before every date and you will approach with confidence and an open heart. Love will flow in.
Bonus: Before your date do something to pump your energy up. I ask many of my clients to turn on their favorite music to dance to or sing out loud. Some people find it centering to take a run or a short workout before they meet with someone new. Have fun with yourself before you date and that energy will carry on into your dating experience.
During The Date
1. Acknowledge Their Awesomness
Whom ever you spend your time with has something awesome about them. They are a fellow human being and even if you already know without a shadow of a doubt that they are not the one, spend your appreciating what is great about them. Though the person might not be who you fall in love with they might still have a powerful effect on how you see yourself. Your kindness and engagement with them may inspire them to express something about you that is healing thus getting you further on the path to love.
2. You Are In This Together.
Just like you, you date is making themselves vulnerable as well. They may be working through their nerves and insecurities just like you. Try not to project “should’s” and obligations on your date. And like wise, do not assume that your date expects certain obligation from you.
Seek a deep connection to them as a person, as we have already talked about. Let them see that you are not judging them and do what you can to help them feel comfortable. They will be able to open up with you and you will see depth into who this person is…. Who may very well be your love.
Be gracious, many times, when our nerves are high and we feel weird and awkward. We react easily to things people around us say or do. You may be surprised at the miraculous things that happen when you both feel open and comfortable.
How Approach The Actual Dating Experience
3 Deep Listening And Focus Cures Feeling Weird
Listening to the person you are with is the best way to start connecting with them. Since we are going to treat our dates with respect for their awesomeness no matter what the outcome, here are some tips on listening.
1. Look them in the eye.
2. Let their words rest with you and really take them in before barreling on to the next thing
3. Suspend judgment of what they are saying
4. Don’t use every opportunity to turn focus back to you with related stories
Bonus: Take the High Road. If you find yourself in an uncomfortable conversation, do not sink to a lower vibration. Try to avoid your energy being drained and look for the positive. Remember, you are not obligated to spend more time with that person. If it doesn’t work out, remember that it is just a wrong fit. There is no rejection in love!
1. Look inward.
Now is the time to check in with how you felt about the experience. Learning about someone new is a process and we need time by ourselves to reflect on our emotions of the experience.
Answer these questions to yourself after every date.
How did you feel about your behavior?
Were you yourself?
Did you feel good about your experience? Why?
What did not work about the experience? Why?
How could you have expressed yourself differently?
Did you enjoy the other person ?
What were the most pleasurable things about this experience?
Did this person express any morals and values that are in balance with my own? Or out of balance with my own?
How did they deal with the environment around us?
Was there anything that seemed like a red flag? Why?
Would you like to see this person again? Why?
2. Release the experience, the person, and vow to not
sweat where it goes.
Be careful of getting attached to someone in these early stages. Releasing allows you to enjoy the connection you had and stay open to where it goes. If you spend time sweating when you or they will call or text, you could start getting into desperation territory. Desperation is the biggest love repellant!
· Seek out distraction from over thinking about the new person in your life.
· Avoid thinking about what the other person must be thinking.
· Say positive affirmation around love and relationships.
· Trust that the Universe has your back. Sometimes miracles happen when you least expect them.
· Remember that love is infinite and you will get love no matter what.
· Reject rejection for it does not exist in love.
Soulmate Magnetization Step 6
Create A Safe Haven For Your Heart
Protect and Strengthen Your Heart
1. Turn away from anything love negative- create boundaries.
- Anything that makes you feel fear around love, turn away from it or eliminate it.
2. Have a script - enforce boundaries
- If you can not leave the situation, mindfully and peacefully let people know that some conversations are not appropriate for you. It is about you creating a boundary not making them change their minds; that is not your job. Inspire those around you into a different conversation.
3. Limit media and entertainment exposure
- Cut way back from common cultural media sources. Give yourself some time to not be inundated with these things.
4. Avoid risk taking situations
- For now, avoid putting yourself in situations that are challenging to you when it comes to love. For example: Stay in instead of going to speed dating. Don't accept a blind date if you are feeling unsure.
1. Look for evidence
- Get snoopy with happily married couples. Ask them what they find works. Look for miracle ridden love stories, they are everywhere. People come together against all odds all of the time.
2. Journal challenges
- Write down everything that caused you pain
- Don't hold back, write down even what you are not proud of thinking
- Feel the release from doing this
- Realize that this was a point a view in the moment and not the reality.
- Reframe what you originally thought to something positive. (See Positive Affirmations template on Bonus page.)
3. Do not ignore negative feelings
- Let them come up and pass. The worst thing we can do about negative feelings(is ignore them.)
- Journal them
Spend time with supportive friends, get romantic in your life, pamper yourself, practice the soul call often
Note: The Release Meditation is on the Archive page.
Soulmate Magnetization Step 5
Commit To Releasing
I (your name), vow to release my old relationships and attachments that are holding me back from a love life that is worthy of me.
3 Tools For Releasing
1. Surrender and release moment by moment and day by day.
-When you think of the person, say “ I release this person to their highest good” EVERY TIME. Every time you do , things will happen, a distraction, a reading, something to distract you.
- Avoid gaining momentum on thoughts that don't serve you.
2. Focus on yourself and your vision for your life when you start to think about your misery.
-Redirect, to your purpose, to your love (that you want), think about the amazingness of you, claim the full life that you deserve
- "This or something better."
3. Deal with pain as it comes up. Bring awareness to pain, married to pain, play part of victim as identity.
Notice when you think of person releasing, what emotions does it cause? BE AWARE IF YOU ARE THINKING ABOUT IT AGAIN. Say it to yourself.
Be aware of where you physically hurt and tensing.
Interrupt thought process. Notice what is around you , what is going on right now.
The person is not there right now. Remind yourself that the person is not there and you are dwelling in the past. Appreciate moment you have right now. OBSERVATION POWERFUL.
Pain dissipate, and you can control your thoughts.
(Insecurity Quiz is in bonus section)
Soulmate Magnetization Step 4
Shine Your Unique Light (So your soulmate can see you!)
1. What do you want?
(None of these things are too trivial and you don't have to make excuses for what you like and what you don't like.)
What do you want? What will make you happy? What feels good? What don't I like?
Make a list of your interests and preferences.
What do I think of my appearance? What is my personality like: outgoing, quiet, funny, serious, etc?
What do I do well? What do I wish I could do? Do you enjoy learning?
What book did I read last? When do I feel sexy? Do I play by the rules or do I stretch them?
How do I relate to others? And my good listener? Am I a good storyteller?
Do I feel comfortable with others quickly or does it take time for me to warm up to them?
3. Accept, Release, Notice, Forgive
Accept yourself and remember that there are so many ways to answer any of these questions and people who have similar answers have found love and enjoy the full lives.
Release any judgments as they come up.
Notice when you're judging yourself and write it down. Ask yourself where the voice of judgment actually came from right down your answer.
Forgive yourself for the judgment say it out loud "I forgive myself for judging myself negatively." Give yourself some understanding for whatever it is that you're judging it doesn't make you a bad person and you were human just like everyone else. Affirm: "I am where the imperfections and all."
Soulmate Magnetization Step 3
Heal Fatal Flaw Beliefs, Reject Rejection, Choose Compassion Over Competition (and comparing)
-List traits and characteristics that you believe are unlovable.
They are traits that you hide, are often unwilling to admit, or try to change in yourself. Often they are also what you judge harshly in others.
- Highlight two or three items on the list that trouble you the most.
Remember that you have no idea what anyone else, especially your love, will think about this Fatal Flaw. Therefore, you are the one who is judging yourself before you even get out of the gate. Refuse any further rejection of any sort internally right now, and vow to continue denying it in the future.
-Think about past loves for whom this characteristic was no big deal. You were loved anyway In your Soulmate Journal write down names of people who overlooked your Fatal Flaw and appreciate them on the inner
If you can’t think of anyone who was okay with your Fatal Flaw, then realize that we often attract those who mirror our own self-judgments.
-Vow to never let anyone in again who sees you as less than amazing. Working on healing your own self-judgment is a wonderful first step in this direction.
-Accept, even try to love, your own, imperfect, lovable self.
If this is difficult for you, think of some of the flaws in past lovers and how accepting you were of them. Learn to be just that accepting of your own weaknesses. This isn’t always easy and can take some work. But any difficulty you have in taking this step is well worth it. You can then be free to live life unfettered by what can be a crippling fear of having this flaw unveiled.
-Write down under the highlighted Fatal Flaws you listed the reasons why they don’t make you hideous or unlovable.
-Say out loud, “I forgive myself for judging myself as unlovable, flaky, big, etc.”
-Close your eyes and visualize your One discovering your flaw and not only loving you anyway, but thinking it's endearing. Describe this revelation in your Soulmate journal.
- Say out loud: “There is no competition.”
-Now think of someone you feel threatened by, someone you feel always gets the girl or whose light you fear shines brighter than your own.
Bless that person silently and write in your journal: “I bless [person’s name] for getting his [or her] love.” Now say the following : “We both get love, and my love can’t see past me.” Write this down next to your blessing for the other person.
Soul Call Meditation
Soulmate Magnetization Step 2
Set an intention, catalyze action
1. Set an intention. Write an intention down
I ____________intend to open up and welcome my soulmate into my heart right now, and will continue to do so until we are in each other’s arms.
Say the intention out loud like you mean business. Say it in front of a trusted small group.
2. Open up inside
View, Think, Practice Anything that helps you open up on the inside
3. Welcome Him or Her into your heart, know that you a speaking into the soul of someone who is living and breathing.
“SOULMATE I WELCOME YOU INTO MY HEART, INTO MY LIFE.”
“I INVITE YOU TO COME TO ME. I AM READY FOR YOU.”
4. Visualize and feel your soulmate. Exploration/ Discovery
What attracted you to each person you’ve loved?
What physical Characteristics were appealing?
What about his personality was pleasing to you?
Why did the relationships end?
What turned you off about past loves
What did you find acceptable in a relationship?
What did you love about yourself in past romances?
What did you contribute to your past loves? What did they say was special about you?
What is the best relationship you’ve had so far and why?(not an invitation to revisit, something better is on the way)
REMAIN OPEN. The universe will bring you more than you imagined for yourself!
Bless list and say “I WILL HAVE THIS OR SOMETHING BETTER.”
5. Put out the welcome mat for your soulmate. Get creative.
- Imagine taking a walk with them, and actually go on that walk
- Buy a gift and put it on an altar or mantle
- Have a yoga or meditation session with them
Download and Practice The Soul Call Meditation
"He's/She's Not the One" Template
" How To Tell If He/She Is The One"
" Magnetization Step 1 Long Version"
Soulmate Magnetization Step 1
Dissolve Negative Thoughts and Let in Hope - So you can Believe He is Out There!
Accept and Vow - Name and Acknowledge - Replace
Accept : Just by doing this homework means that you have accepted the need for an attitude adjustment, congratulations.
Vow: “I (Your Name) intend to open up to love and get on the path to my Soulmate, right now.”
Name: Write down cynicisms , negative remarks, everything that has wounded your heart throughout your love life so far, BE THOROUGH. Leave space below each thing you write down.
“All relationships are great in the beginning but then you know, the other shoe drops."
“Dating in this city is so bad.”
"There was this time when a guy told me that I was not the marrying type."
Acknowledge: Take a moment to recognize that this represents a past version of you with beliefs that you now know do not serve you anymore.You have the power to believe what you want, always.
Replace: Go back and write hopeful attitudes to replace the negative ones. These are positive affirmations with a specific focus.
“All relationships are great in the beginning but then you know, the other shoe drops.”
“With my Soulmate, things will continue to get better. The love never stops growing.”
“Dating in this city is so bad.”
“Dating is happening here, I see couples good on dates all of the time.”
“There was this time when a guy told me that I was not the marrying type.”
“I will be such an fantastic wife. Marriage between my soulmate and myself is going to be epic!”
Note: Write down something positive that you can believe. If your old negative belief is, “There is no good men left.” And it is hard for you to believe a new positive one such as “There are so many extraordinary eligible men and I attract them.” Then take a smaller bite and continue to take small bites as you step your way up. Try, “There are some decent men here and there.” Then when you believe this, try “There are some good eligible men.” Then, “There are many amazing, eligible men and they have been noticing me.” Then “There are so many amazing, eligible men and I attract them.”